ew my title sounds like giving birth.
ew. MIRACLE OF LIFE.
but forealz: grade nine. one more day left.
then exams. then summer.
fuckk its just crazy.
theres this little bit of work left to do
then BAM. tenth grade.
and then that will end, then eleventh grade.
then the final year of sma.
fuckk. 'the best years of my life' are going fast.
i dont want to waste them meandering along.
i want to DO stuff.
and that could be like i dont like dating...
it feels kinda like a...trap?
like, i dont enjoy being confined- always giving my time to the same person constantly.
im the kind of person who mixes things up.
and thats why my previous relationships have ended,
because ive become tired with them.
or it could also be because i never found the right guy...
thats beside the point.
the point is: life is passing by too quickly
and thats one of the few things im terrified of:
heights. confined spaces. time... rejection.
the thing is, time passing is simply something you cannot ignore.
im afraid.
all i can do is try to do the best i can currently
and try to live in the moment.
basically, 'the final push' refers to 'the last thing moment before the next'.
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